Lance Armstrong, With One Strong Testicle, Knocks Up Girlfriend

My dad once told me something I've kept with me for years and years -- "Why do with two testicles what you can get done with one?"

Lance Armstrong took that advice to heart, impregnating his girlfriend

Ashley Olsen

Anna Hansen, who is expecting a baby in June.

All jokes aside (because I actually think Lance is awesome), this is pretty good news for testicular cancer patients. According to the CNN report, Armstrong and ex-wife Kristin Richards tried to have a kid after Armstrong went through chemotherapy but couldn't because of his testicular cancer. Armstrong and Richards did have three children using sperm the cyclist had donated before the treatment, though.

"This is a hopeful thing for testicular cancer survivors," CNN medical correspondent Dr. Sanjay Gupta said. "It means his body healed from the chemotherapy and surgery."

This isn't the only thing on Lance's plate this summer. Our main cycling man has announced he is planning on riding in the Tour de France again after retiring in 2005. Now, even if he doesn't return home with the yellow jersey, he will have a prize wrapped in either pink or blue.

Congrats Lance and Anna, if you guys were actually trying to get pregnant. If not, damn. I know what to stuff your stockings with this Christmas.

After the jump is how I believe the news went down between Lance and Anna (NSFW, but if you work on Christmas Eve, do you really care?).

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