Man Your IOC Battle Stations!

All hands on deck for Olympic visit

By Steve Rhodes
|  Tuesday, Jul 21, 2009  |  Updated 3:58 PM CDT
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"Choose Us" Chicago Says

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Chicagoans reporting for duty!

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Chicago 2016 is calling for "all hands on deck" this week as the evaluation commission of the International Olympic Committee visits Chicago and assesses our team spirit, commitment to Olympic ideals, strength of character, and depth of our pocketbooks.

In other words . . . battle stations!  Everyone to their posts!

"Volunteers are being enlisted to do everything from facilitate arrivals and departures at the airport to participate in what Volunteer Program Manager Deb McDonald calls a citywide pep rally," Chicago 2016 says.

The team arrives on Thursday and leaves next Tuesday. Here are a few things you can do to help while they are here.

- Fill those potholes! Don't wait around for government to do it for you. Take a trip to Home Depot and learn how to do it yourself. Of course, if the city had been thinking, they would have paid someone to put the Olympic logo on repairs instead of turning to KFC.

- Spread the good news! Join our team as we replace every newspaper on every newsstand and in every news rack and on every front step with RedEye while the commission is here.

- Stay home! We don't want the IOC getting the wrong idea about our stellar traffic management system. In fact, cancel your flights, too, we can't afford to be embarrassed by O'Hare gridlock.

- Dress sharp! If you must go out, wear your interview clothes. And suck in your gut.

- Act warm! In fact, act like it's summer. Volleyball games on North Avenue Beach are now forming.

- Service with a smile! And, just for now, take care of Cook County sales taxes yourself instead of passing them on to commission members. Consider it a down payment on your next inspection.

- Act like you have a job! The good side to rising unemployment is that so many more folks will be available to attend our big pep rally. But act like you are so enthused about the Olympics that you snuck out of work and really should be getting back - but what the heck, this is too much fun! 

Steve Rhodes, the proprietor of The Beachwood Reporter, is totally willing to pick up evaluation commission members at the airport, but curiously hasn't heard back from Chicago 2016.

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