Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you sit at home and commemorate the one-month anniversary of the BP Gulf oil spill. HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, EVERYONE! Has it really been that long? Boy, I remember when the spill was but a mere leak. LET’S GO!
BIGGEST LOSER (FINALE) – 8:00PM (NBC) It’s the finale tonight, and a new fatty champion will be crowned. I have some experience in this whole weight loss thing, and I have to tell you that the most important thing to remember about losing weight is this: It’s not that hard if you don’t think of it as hard. If you plan on dropping 50 pounds and you’re like, “Oh man, this is gonna stink. I can’t do this,” you’ve already failed. But if you treat it casually in your mind, if you don’t think of it as some big huge deal, it helps. Trust me. If these tubbies can do it, you can too. ANTICIPATION: NOT AS FAT!
AMERICAN IDOL – 8:00PM (FOX) We’re down to the final two. I’ll allow my mom to evaluate the final pairing. On Crystal Bowersox: “She has a nice voice, I guess. But who’s gonna buy a record from HER?” And now Lee DeWyze: “Some dope that never smiles.” And there you have it in a nutshell. My mom is far more concise than Kara ever will be. ANTICIPATION: SOON OUT OF ITS MISERY!
GLEE – 9:00PM (FOX) Tonight is the big Lady Gaga episode, and the Gleesters will be tackling “Poker Face” (MA MA MA MOW) and “Bad Romance.” Expect lots of goofy costumes. Also tonight, the boys from the show do “Shout It Out Loud” by KISS. But they won’t do “Lick It Up,” which is sooo much more subtle of a song. ANTICIPATION: CAN’T READ MY TV FACE!
LAKERS/SUNS – 9:00PM (TNT) Marv Albert interviews the President at halftime tonight. ANTICIPATION: YES! AND IT COUNTS!
DANCING WITH THE STARS – 9:00PM (ABC) Your winner is crowned tonight, and loogit who predicted the final three expertly. Do not mess with me when it comes to dancing prognostication, people. I am the Jimmy the Greek of the ballroom curcuit. JAZZ HANDS! ANTICIPATION: GO SEXY ERIN!