news

Not finding love is a top worry for 1-in-4 Gen Zers, poll shows: 3 tips for coping with the fear of being single

Guillermo Spelucin | Moment | Getty Images

For Gen Zers looking for love, the playing field is a little different than that of Millennials when they were in their 20's.

Some Zoomers seem to be getting married at younger ages and while they're jumping the broom and starting families, a number of unpartnered Gen Zers are dealing with anxiety about their romantic future.

A quarter of Gen Zers polled in February noted "not finding love" as their greatest worry, according to an EduBirdie survey of 2,000 participants from the generation. Finding a life partner was one of the biggest perceived challenges for 22% of those polled — a bigger concern for them than finding meaningful career opportunities.

The push for settling down cropping up much sooner for Gen Z, coupled with higher levels of loneliness, means it can be tough to cope with fears of being single forever and being seen as an outcast because of it.

Here are some practical ways that relationship experts recommend Zoomers handle their FOMO around romantic relationships.

3 tips for overcoming loneliness and the FOMO on romantic connections

1. Pay attention to your mindset

"Pay attention and put some energy into managing your mindset and understanding what kinds of thinking patterns are helpful versus unhelpful," says Lisa Marie Bobby, a psychologist and founder of Growing Self Counseling & Coaching.

Telling yourself things like "I'm never going to find my person" or "I'm going to be alone forever" is not great for your mood and perspective, Bobby says. Without knowing it, you can be shifting your mood and therefore shifting your behaviors by thinking such negative thoughts.

Bobby admits that reframing your thoughts around dating is a skill that takes time to master, but notes that not being more mindful of unhelpful thoughts can make you more anxious and fragile while dating.

"In the dating process, they will be less resilient, they will also be a little weirder when it comes to the actual interactions that they have with humans, because everything is so fraught by this fearful narrative and what it means about them," Bobby says.

"So they will not show up as their best selves. They will come across as being either closed [off] or maybe kind of needy sometimes," she says, which can hurt their chances of developing a healthy relationship.

2. Focus on yourself and your needs

When you're single, that is a great time to focus on how you feel and what you want for yourself in all aspects of your life.

It is a "very important part of the self development and self discovery process because you have the opportunity to have a lot more clarity about who you are, and really just have total leeway to do the things that are interesting to you without having to make sure that that's okay with somebody else," Bobby says.

Anastasiya Pochotna, a dating and relationship expert for dating app Flirtini, agrees, adding that singlehood can be a great period of growth.

"Go with your friends somewhere or alone, have a lot of hobbies," Pochotna says.

"Because you will find somebody [and] you will have love, but the only one person with whom you will be with all of your life is you."

3. Prioritize building solid friendships

At times, being single can lead to loneliness but Bobby says loneliness is normal just like any other emotion and is actually "a sign that we need to have more authentic, meaningful connections in our lives."

Use feelings of loneliness as an indicator that it's time to "take stock of your life and not just a significant other, but your friend group, your community, your family," she says. "How are you connected to other people?"

Really assess the quality of the connections in your life because loneliness can affect you even when you're surrounded by people.

Pochotna notes that finding friends can also be a natural way to find love. "[Some] people start their love from the friendship. It's a very common story," she says.

"Try to find friends, and maybe that friendship will grow into the best love [of] your life."

Want to be a successful, confident communicator? Take CNBC's new online course Become an Effective Communicator: Master Public Speaking. We'll teach you how to speak clearly and confidently, calm your nerves, what to say and not say, and body language techniques to make a great first impression. Preregister today and use code EARLYBIRD for an introductory discount of 30% off through July 10, 2024.

Plus, sign up for CNBC Make It's newsletter to get tips and tricks for success at work, with money and in life.

Copyright CNBC
Contact Us