Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV that may be worth staying in and gorging on Mounds for. Mounds. Such an underappreciated candy. The dark chocolate makes it SING. LET’S GO!
LOST – 9:00PM (ABC)
Tonight’s episode is entitled “Dr. Linus.” Hmm. Is the whole show devoted to Ben? Will we learn the secret of his Sideways world teaching job? Are the Others just an illusion? Where is the Holy Grail hidden? WAS STONEHENGE ACTUALLY BUILT BY SUPERINTELLIGENT SPACEBOTS WHO ARE TRYING TO SIGNAL TO US THE DATE THEY WILL RETURN TO DESTROY US ALL? WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN? So many questions. ANTICIPATION: HEAD SCRATCHING!
BEING JOHN DALY – 9:00PM (Golf Channel)
Yes, PGA tour veteran and world’s favorite overweight chain smoker John Daly has his own reality show. It’s like a country music song set to film. Remember kids: When Tiger Woods cheats on his wife with any number of assorted skanks, that’s baaaaaad. But when John Daly and his problems? CHARMING. ANTICIPATION: REDNECKY!
THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA – 8:00PM (FX)
And tonight begins the process of Academy voters gradually realizing that NOT giving Meryl Streep an Oscar for either this movie or “Julie and Julia” was a huge mistake. Watch next year as Streep wins a make-good Best Actress Oscar for a performance that clearly isn’t as good as this one.
MILLIONAIRE MATCHMAKER – 10:00PM (Bravo, an NBC/Universal network)
Patty helps find love for an Indiana farmer. And I assume teaches him how to use a fork. Those Indiana hayseeds. Soooo unrefined. ANTICIPATION: CREEPY!
16 AND PREGNANT – 10:00PM (MTV)
A popular girl believes life will return to normal after giving birth. Come, other parents. Join me as we laugh in this girl’s naïve little face. ANTICIPATION: TEARS!