Chicago's Double-Dipping Santa

From City Hall to the CTA, a man about town

By Steve Rhodes
|  Monday, Dec 22, 2008  |  Updated 9:00 AM CDT
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Chicago's Double-Dipping Santa

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Chicago is Santa's kind of town.

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He's Checking it Twice Right Now!

It's 15-below at the North Pole today, but that's not slowing the operation.
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We all know that Santa lives in that house on Daley Plaza where he is in close proximity to the mayor - and the mayor can keep an eye on him to make sure he gives out gifts to, you know, the right people. But the Big Guy (Santa - not Daley) manages to sneak away every now and then for some double-dipping when the mayor isn't looking. We've found proof in the many sightings of Santa in Chicago documented on the World Wide Web, which will soon make it possible for us to know when he's sleeping, when he's awake, when he's slacking off, and when he's soliciting bribes from roofers and chimney inspectors.

For example, here's Santa on the Brown Line. No delays!

And here's Santa outside City Hall leading a rally against privatizing parking meters.

Here he is stealing business from the horse cabs on Michigan Avenue.

And, oops, don't tell Mrs. Claus!

Now, don't tell the inspector general, but we have a feeling this isn't authorized use of a city fire truck. And isn't Santa violating union rules, too?

Wow, tough crowd.

Meanwhile, Santa's relatives from the Old Sod are in town this year, making Chicago a little brighter.

So get out there and enjoy Santa wherever you can find him.

Because next year you might need a visitor's pass if you want to sit on his knee.

Posted Jul 16, 2009
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