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Five (Completely Insane) Free Agent Moves the Bears Should Make

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    NEWSLETTERS

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    JACKSONVILLE, FL - DECEMBER 26: Quarterback Rex Grossman #8 of the Washington Redskins is pressured by Jeremy Mincey #94 of the Jacksonville Jaguars during the game at EverBank Field on December 26, 2010 in Jacksonville, Florida. (Photo by Sam Greenwood/Getty Images) *** Local Caption *** Rex Grossman; Jeremy Mincey

    Because of the impending lockout, the Bears have to act fast to figure out a free agency plan of attack. Grizzly Detail has a few (completely ridiculous) suggestions for Jerry Angelo and the front office.

    5. Bring Back Rex Grossman
    . Don't act like the 2006 season wasn't fun. It can happen again with Rex on the market. Sure, Grossman only played one complete season in Chicago and he never had a quarterback rating north of 75, plus he threw four interceptions as a back-up for Washington. Caleb Hanie is a reliable back-up who doesn't bring drama and already understands Mike Martz's complicated offense, but that's no fun. It's Sexy Rexy Time!

    4. Sign John Kuhn just to make Packers fans cry. The third-down back came up with just 281 yards for the Pack, but boy do they love him in Green Bay. Every time he looks at the ball, Lambeau Field fills with the sounds of "KUUUUUUUHHHNNNNNNNNN!" The Bears have a reliable back in Matt Forte, and seem committed to Chester Taylor, but it would be fun to see the horror on the faces of Packers fans everywhere when Kuhn donned the navy and orange.

    3. Two words: Randy. Moss
    . He's crazy. He's unreliable. He played for three teams in 2010 and made just 28 catches for 393 yards. He would also spice up this Bears receiving corps that is steady but kind of boring. We need someone with a lack of the good judgment, class and grace of Moss to make things exciting.

    2. Continue to use the Carolina Panthers as a farm team, and sign Charles Johnson
    . The Panthers did a great job developing Julius Peppers for eight years to get him ready to play for the Bears. Chris Harris spent three seasons in Carolina. When he returned to the Bears, he had five interceptions. The Bears should call up Charles Johnson, the DE with 11.5 sacks in 2010, to play in the big leagues.

    1. Head down to Mississippi to get Brett Favre to unretire
    . Then, in off-season workouts, Corey Wootton will sack him back into retirement again.