Having had her career prospects dwindle to judging drag queen competitions on Logo
, former Destiny's Child Michelle Williams must be seething at this new way Beyoncé's devised to cash in (a little more) on all single ladies not currently suffering from financial failure. Miss B really did mean it when she issued the materialistic list-poem that is this song
. On her latest tour
, fabulous single lady (or gentleman), can be one of up to 15 individuals on the night of your concert to earn an intimate audience with Beyoncé
and some other mildly interesting spoils for the low price of just under $1,800 (not including various fees assessed by Ticketmaster, like service charges, processing charges, both your kidneys, your firstborn, and so forth). A detailed list of additional loot after the jump.
A photo taken that very evening. More lurid than a receipt for the exorbitant sum you pay for this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, the framed photograph will be there, hanging above your fireplace, a constant reminder about the nearly two grand that got away.
Front-row seats. Well, obviously.
Open bar. Once again, obviously. But word to the wise, the queen might not take kindly to single ladies who can’t hold their liquor. Although, who knows, she could very well challenge you to a game of Beirut in her dressing room. In which case, start practicing.
Swag bag. Contents include autographed tour book and a wristband (bling!). Also, a one-year membership to the Beyoncé’s fan club, which seems meaningless in this Facebook age, but I suppose B won’t be denied.