No one ever accused Mike Singletary of being the calmest dude in the world or, for that matter, the sanest. His midseason transition antics with the 49ers -- freaking out on Vernon Davis in a press conference after his first game (his first game! as an interim coach!) was bad enough, and then rumors that he pulled his pants down in the locker room at halftime of a 49ers' loss was even worse. And even more hilarious. Mike Singletary, great Bear that he is, makes us laugh these days.
That said, the man did get a few wins toward the end of the year. The Niners went 5-4, slightly better than before Singletary was hired, and the fiery coach earned himself a full-time gig running the team. (He promptly fired offensive coordinator Mike Martz and a bunch of other people.) So what is Singletary's plan for revamping the 49ers? What are his grand schemes? And why should people in Chicago care in the least? Because Mike wants to be just like the '85 Bears:
Singletary says his template for reviving his sub-.500 49ers will be the Bears teams he played for during a Hall of Fame career, including the Super Bowl XX team of coach Mike Ditka that featured running back Walter Payton.
"In Chicago we developed a nasty offensive line that was physical at the point of attack," Singletary said. "And we had a defense that was pretty nasty. It is going to take a little time to develop that [in San Francisco]. But running the ball, to me, is extremely important. When you need to run, you have to look at that offensive line and say, 'OK, guys, here it is, let's go.' "
Again, why is this noteworthy? Because, like Singletary himself, it is hilarious. This is not 1985. The 1985 Bears couldn't exist now, because having that much veteran star power on one team is basically impossible to pull off. Even the Patriots, a modern-day dynasty, have stayed on top by retaining a few key players each year and drafting well enough to replenish their ranks with capable young guys. Also, scheme: The Patriots have won because Bill Belichick is a master schemer. Same with the '85 Bears and their 46 defense. Unless Singletary is planning on inventing a new scheme that will similarly blow opposing offenses or defense out of the water -- and no, the 46 won't work, not anymore -- it's going to be quite the uphill climb.
Either way, if the old Bear promises to pull down his pants at least once a month, we'll be paying attention. That's for sure.