Rahm Reads to Kids Without Cussing Once

Ad-libs political strategy, cracks up at own jokes

If Rahm Emanuel’s political career ever falls apart, he could always write children’s books.

Emanuel already took a few steps down that path when he editorialized the kiddie book “Duck Runs for President,” during an August 10 “Read to the Top” event for kids at the White House.

Emanuel, seated next to two other Chicago political elites, Arne Duncan and Melody Barnes, took liberties with the story about a duck that runs for president and filled in the gaps on strategy.

Rahm Reads to Children

“Have you seen the other one? Duck runs for Congress? Really good book,” he said to a group of kids who don’t really get the joke.

The Washington Post’s blog “44” notes that the best part of the video may not be Rahm’s one liners but Barnes’ attempts not to bust out laughing at them.

Here are a few other gems from the ad-libbed performance.

When the animals in the book put together a voter registration drive:

“Farmer Brown was furious, he ran to the barn to find the animals registering to vote,” Emanuel reads. “… it’s obviously not in Chicago."

When the Duck wins the presidency:

“Big comeback for the challenger. Duck was officially in charge.  … Anybody know what his biggest decision was after that? Picking that chief of staff. A lot can go wrong. It’s a tough choice."

After Duck assumes office:

 … “And duck is working on his autobiography. … do you think he got an advance for that kids?”

When he finishes the story:

“All yours Arne, beat that,” Emanuel says to Duncan.

When one little girl asks: “Do you actually get to see the president?” Emanuel replies: “We actually do. His office is down the hall from ours … sometimes he thinks he’s doing too much.”

The video was funny, but we were hoping for an F-bomb somewhere in there. 

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