Poor Roseanne Barr.
The 59-year-old Emmy winner--and prospective Presidential nominee--had no idea her estranged ex Tom Arnold was going to make a surprise appearance at her Comedy Central Roast yesterday in Hollywood.
So did things get nasty?
U.S. & World
Let's just say, compared to the Comedy Central Roast of Charlie Sheen, it all seemed tame (but still pretty darn funny).
Pre-show, Barr wasn't sweating any of the impending insults from celeb roasters like Seth Green, Katey Sagal or Ellen Barkin. "I'm not nervous at all, I'm excited," she told us. "It's going to be a blast as soon as I get in there and start drinking!"
Roastmaster Jane Lynch opened the show with only mild jabs. "She's one of those rare celebrities so famous that she's referred to by just one name--bitch," Lynch joked. "I waved to you outside but then I realized it was just one of those inflatable parking lot gorillas.
Comedian Jeffrey Ross went for Barr's weight and bid for the presidency. "I've got to give it to you, you've been tortured and abused all night and you're still hanging in there. Roseanne, I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to the chair you're sitting on," adding, "I'd only roast a pig if it had an apple in its mouth."
Ross went on with the zingers, "Instead of running for president, why don't you try walking on a treadmill. I'd vote for you but I'm against big government. That's just what we need, a round president in an oval office."
Towards the end of the show, Arnold surprised everyone, including Barr, by taking the stage. Arnold poked at Barr with, "I'm not here to tear Roseanne a new one, because I've seen the old one," but paid her the biggest complement in the end.
"In 1985, Roseanne went on Johnny Carson, which is every comic's dream back then," he said. "She killed, he laughed his ass off, he gave her a thumbs up and he invited her to sit on his couch. She got validation from the king which can never be taken away from her."
And I just want to say, Rosanne, you were my Johnny Carson. And thank you for the thumbs up and thank you for inviting me to sit on your couch for a little bit."
The Comedy Central Roast of Roseanne airs Sunday, Aug. 12, at 10 p.m.