Parents of children in need of running a quick errand may often dream of opting out of battling with their kids for a short trip to the store, but how old do kids legally need to be in order to stay home alone?
While most states leave the decision up to the parents' discretion, Illinois is one of a few states with an established legal guideline regarding the issue.
“Illinois law defines a neglected minor, in part, as ‘any minor under the age of 14 years whose parent or other person responsible for the minor’s welfare leaves the minor without supervision for an unreasonable period of time without regard for the mental or physical health, safety or welfare of that minor,’” according to the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services (DCFS).
The state defines an “unreasonable” period of time with different variables, a spokesperson from Illinois’ DCFS told TODAY.com
“Is the caregiver leaving them alone for two hours or five days? Who else is the child also responsible for taking care of, if anyone?” said the spokesperson. “Does the child have adequate food and shelter and are they in a safe environment? Do they know how to contact medical personnel if needed? Do they know what to do in case of emergency?”
Neighboring Indiana offers no specific age regarding the issue legally.
“A parent is ultimately responsible for supervision of their child until the child reaches the age of 18,” states the Indiana State Government. “Often parents leave their children unattended at an earlier age or allow children younger than age 18 to provide childcare for other children. Under the age of 18, the law gives parents discretion to make these decisions based on the perceived risk and weighing such factors as maturity of the child, physical environmental risks, etc.”
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When is it OK to leave kids home alone?
Generally, 12 and older is “a pretty acceptable age,” family therapist Sheryl Ziegler tells TODAY.com, echoing the recommended range from the American Academy of Pediatrics. According to Ziegler, tweens have usually experienced slices of independence like walking to a friend’s house or to the bus stop.
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Of course, it depends on your kid. Parents need to think about a child’s comfort level, maturity, emotional and physical health, environment, access to support and whether older or younger siblings will be present.
If you want to take the leap, learn your state law — and all its nuances — to avoid accidentally committing child neglect.
“Many states' child protection laws classify ‘failing to provide adequate supervision of a child’ as child neglect,” according to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. “But in most cases, States do not define what is considered ‘adequate supervision.’”
Then, ask these questions before taking what Ziegler calls “a thoughtful, calculated risk.”
Is my child emotionally ready?
Even if you trust your child, they may not be prepared for this milestone. Check whether they’re comfortable and interested in a daytime experiment that Ziegler says shouldn’t exceed 30 to 45 minutes.
“You could say, ‘Your brother is so busy with sports and I know you hate tagging along. You’re starting to show signs that I can trust you to stay home alone for a short period of time,’” says Ziegler, author of “The Crucial Years: The essential guide to mental health and modern puberty in middle childhood (ages 6-12).”
She adds, “Some kids are excited and others are scared, in which case, this isn’t an issue you want to push.”
You should feel confident that your kid follows rules and respects boundaries — even if you plop them down in front of a device, they still might snoop through people’s bedrooms, access adult content online or play with matches, says Ziegler, recommending that parents keep alcohol, tobacco and weapons securely locked.
Is my child a problem-solver?
“Can your kid do basic things for themself?” asks Ziegler.
Before staying home alone, kids should be self-sufficient to a certain degree, able to prepare a meal, use the bathroom independently and clean a cut and apply a bandaid, says Ziegler.
Do kids understand not to open the door for anyone, be it delivery people, solicitors or people they know? Do they know to stay inside the home and not leave? If your child can’t answer these questions correctly, teach them the rules.
Does my child have support?
Your child should memorize your phone number, their home address and any access codes to the building, along with how and when to call 911.
While you’re out of the house, “Check in with your child mid-way through, but don’t overdo it or they won’t feel trusted,” says Ziegler. Or, ask a neighbor to drop by, provided your child knows who to expect.
Also, charge all electronic devices so your child has a line to the outside world.