Here's a great way to keep teenage boys off steroids and other performance enhancers. Boys, if you take steroids, sex will hurt and you'll grow giant man-boobs!
Honestly, I think that needs to be in some sort of commercial. What 16 year-old boy would try to labor through the work of obtaining illicit substances, evading drug tests -- and all the other trouble it would be to juice -- in order to forego his adult sex life and grow female features?
Dan Clark, the American Gladiator formerly known as "Nitro," is coming out with a book about his life. In it, he says that he eventually had to undergo breast reduction surgery, in 1996, to free himself of the dreaded man boobs. On the bedroom performance ... uh ...
(Steroids) also took their toll on his private parts, so much so that he embarrassingly had to explain to women what was going on. "My b- - -s never really regained their size. They're kind of shriveled," he sadly told one bedmate. In addition, steroids subjected him to a "dull throbbing pain" every time he had sex.
Other than wondering how something can be both throbbing and dull at the same time, I don't think I really want to imagine the after effects of abusing your body like that for 20 years.
If you think you can handle the drug in small doses, think again, says Clark:
After finally going for therapy, Clark kicked his habit. He writes: "The treacherous steroid path. I always thought I could handle it. But the drug handled me. Easily and completely . . . I was never big enough or strong enough for myself."
People, let's just make a pact to steer clear of body-altering drugs with significant side effects, okay? Lord knows I don't ask you for much.
Hat-tip: Game On