2002's "Swept Away" starring Madonna and directed by Guy Ritchie is as good a reason as any for couples to never work together.
BAD MEANING GOOD: Take a break from trying to figure out who's going to wine what at the Oscars and check out some films vying for the title of the best worst movie ever made. Every Monday night, The Burlington will screens films more worthy of a Razzie as part of its Bad Meaning Good movie night. 8 p.m., 3425 W. Fullerton Ave., FREE
MOVIOKE! The first Monday of every month, movie fans head to The Whistler for Movioke -- a chance to act out your favorite movie lines. Think karaoke with movie scenes instead of music, only you get to wear costumes and act out the scenes in front of a big screen. 9 p.m., 2421 N. Milwaukee Ave., NO COVER
BOTTOMS UP: Mondays are typically industry-night affairs, and one of the most popular goes down at Social Twenty-Five. If you're in the biz, enjoy someone else mixing your drink for once, if not, it's a great opportunity to holler at that cute bartender who's now off-duty. Get down to DJ Gordo's video mixes. 10:30 p.m., 25 W Hubbard St, NO COVER