Woman Arrested for One-Two Punch on Red Line

"Crazy" lady at Belmont adds injury to insult

Some people work out their aggression at the gym or by playing a video game ... other people go the Red Line.

Nicole Patrick, 39, is one of those. She recently caused a mini-panic on a crowded EL train platform because she was unhappy with the directions that some innocent bystanders passed along to her.

Patrick, upset that she was told she was about to get on the wrong train, started hurling expletives, racial epithets and finally punches. Needless to say, she left in handcuffs.

The whole thing went down like this.

Patrick was having a particularly loud conversation on her cell phone just before 7 p.m. Sunday at the Belmont CTA Station. The woman was talking how hard it was to get Lawrence Ave from there, one Chicagoist commenter wrote. A few people (and probably most of the platform) overheard her and tried to tell her she was getting on the wrong train.

"She listens and then they go: wait, did you want to get to Lawrence and Kimball? Then she starts yelling that they're dumb Mother [expletive] and how it was her right! She then walked away over to another group of people, where I'm assuming the craziness went down."

In that "craziness," Patrick allegedly called two men who were standing together on the platform a word not suitable for print.

Suddenly, the Red Line station turned into a scene from a movie: Two men enter, one woman leave!

According to police, one of the men "took exception" to the hurled insult, and Patrick punched him square in the chest and scratched his neck. When the injured man's companion tried to help him, she punched the second man in the nose.

Fortunately, other people came to their aid and were able to restrain the offending woman until police arrived.

And, as a surprise to no one, the police said Patrick was "intoxicated, combative, and very aggressive."

And this is why I never give directions to anyone.

Matt Bartosik, a "between blogs" blogger, is occasionally suitable for print.

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