Polite Burglary Suspect Held on $3 Million Bond

Never wrote, never called ...

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    NEWSLETTERS

    TK
    Getty Images

    Dear Miss Manners, what is the appropriate way to thank your arresting officer?

    Police believe they have caught the apologetic burglar who repeatedly expressed remorse as he stole from a Skokie woman's home last month.

    Jake C. Smith, 41, was arrested in his Chicago home Wednesday night and charged with felony home invasion.

    On August 27, Smith broke into a house through the garage and explained to the woman living there that he hadn't had a job for a long time, said police.

    "I don't want to do this, but... I have three children to support," he said, according to police.

    Smith left with over $500 cash, jewelry, and some electronics, police said.

    He reportedly told the victim that he would call her and tell her where he was pawning the stolen jewelry so she could get it back.

    Police say he never called though.

    Ugh, men. How typical.

    Officials have neither revealed the evidence that led them to Smith nor reported if he actually has "three children to support."

    Matt Bartosik is a Chicago native and a social media sovereign.