"The clothes make the man," the old saying goes.
That must be true, because without his clothes, one retired cop was a pain in the exposed rear.
Schodtler, a retired Chicago cop, decided to relax and let it all hang out at Lake of the Woods Nudist Colony. He told police that on Sunday morning, he placed towels on several chairs near the pool area, hoping to reserve them.
But when he came back to the pool later, his towels were gone, according to the Post-Tribune.
It turns out the pool attendant had removed them from the chairs. She explained to police later that the club did not allow people to reserve chairs.
Schodtler says he pointed at her and reprimanded her for touching his things.
Um, his towels, that is.
Schodtler then reported that the woman poked him in the chest, saying she wasn't afraid of him. The retired cop said he defended himself and "pushed her back with one hand, causing her to fall," according to police.
The pool attendant said she never poked him, but that she pointed at him just before he shoved her with both hands. She then fell to the ground and hit her buttocks, back, and head.
Several witnesses told police what they saw of the attack, and Schodtler was taken to Porter County Jail on a charge of battery.
The pool attendant refused medical treatment at the scene.