Blagogate is so ripe for parody it's hard to know where to start, but the political-satire-media complex is in a fair amount of agreement on where to end: with a reworking of the holiday classic "'Twas The Night Before Christmas" that celebrates the work of our esteemed U.S. attorney.
Let's take a look.
Author: John Kass
Opening verse: 'Twas the night before Fitzmas and all through the house
The federals were listening for the sound of a mouse.
The wiretaps were hung by the chimneys with care
With sugarplum visions of the rats they would snare.
Replacement reindeer names: Rezko, Kelly, Amish and Stu; Wyma, Harris, Rahm and Ata, too.
Author: Mike Stawarski
Opening verse: 'Twas the night before Fitzmas, all still at Rod’s house
While the Feds vetted transcripts: “That Blago’s a louse.”
A Senate seat’s empty, the temptation is great
To use the advantage and change Blago’s fate.
Replacement reindeer names: Tribune, Cubbies, Obama and pols.
Author: Gadfly (check out the illustration)
Opening verse: 'Twas the night before Fitzmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a spouse;
The talking points were hung at the Obama pad with care,
In hopes that a new Senator soon would be there.
Replacement reindeer: Axelrod, Rahmbo, Little Jesse Jackson; Tony Rezko, Billy Ayres, Rashid Khalidi
Author: Beachwood Reporter (Disclaimer: I had a hand in this)
Opening verse: Twas the night before Fitzmas, and all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even the louse,
He had no way of knowing, what the morning would bring,
But he found out at 6, when Fitz gave him a ring
Replacement reindeer: Rezko, Harris, Kelly, Lon Monk; Ali Ata (you gotta talk out of your funk)
