What's Funny About a Bank Robbery?
Writer suggests bank robbing kits be given to jobless
By KATY MOORE
Updated 11:45 AM CST, Tue, Mar 10, 2009
Kinko's FedEx Office is offering customers free resume printing today.
Clients will get 25 resume copies for free at several locations.
There's a reminder of this offer on Page 3 of today's Chicago Tribune. The Trib also offers suggestions of thing other businesses might offer the jobless during these tough times.
Writer Chris McNamara suggests Sam's Wines & Spirits offer Wild Turkey "gratis" and Walgreens could hand out complimentary Xanax.
Cute. Funny. I get it. But it's the suggestion in the middle of the page that offends me.
The author suggests Patagonia give away free ski masks, leather gloves and duffel bags. For what? So the unemployed can resort to robbing banks? Really?
There's nothing illegal about drowning your sorrows in a glass of bourbon or relieving your anxiety with a prescription drug. While booze and pills aren't necessarily the healthiest approach, they make sense in moderation sometimes.
But robbing a bank? Still a no-no. Even in this economy, stealing is wrong.
Who hasn't wished for money they didn't have to earn? Winning the lottery, an inheritance from a long-lost rich relative, it is always good to dream. But suggesting we get bank-robbing kits isn't funny.
Instead how about some free power suits from Macy's for that job interview? Or free haircuts and a shave at Truefitt & Hill to impress prospective employers?
These suggestions may not be as funny, but they won't land you on the FBI's Most Wanted list either.
First Published: Mar 10, 2009 11:05 AM CST
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