Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you stay at home and begin stretching your stomach in anticipation of Thanksgiving. I, for one, am eating all the beer-soaked bread dough I can. The expansion should allow me to fit in at least seven drumsticks and a pie. LET’S GO!
TOWN HALL ON IMMIGRATION – 10:00PM (MSNBC) You’ve had a long day at work. Why not unwind this evening by flipping over to MSNBC and watching people argue about immigration until your head explodes? I think you’ll find it an unreasonably relaxing two hours. Your hosts are Lawrence O’Donnell and Maria Teresa Kumar of Voto Latino. Also there to sex things up will be Hollywood starlet Rosario Dawson. Oh, yes. Tell me you can resist a serious discussion of a troubling issue that has no one clear solution. You cannot. ANTICIPATION: STERN!
HOUSE – 8:00PM (FOX) Dylan Baker guest stars tonight as a CDC doctor who locks down the hospital out of concern about a potential smallpox outbreak. Now, Dylan Baker is a fine actor, but if you’ve ever seen “Happiness,” chances are you have a hard time envisioning him as anything other than a terrifying pederast. I know that isn’t fair, but that’s just how it is. If I ever saw Dylan Baker in a Gymboree shop, I’d call the FBI instantly. ANTICIPATION: CREEPY!
ONE ANGRY JUROR – 9:00PM (Lifetime) Jessica Capshaw stars in this Lifetime movie about a lawyer who serves on a jury, thinks the defendant was framed, and then becomes that defendant’s lawyer when he gets a second trial. It’s based on a true story, and I must say it’s quite a juicy one. Isn’t it illegal for a lawyer to represent someone they were on a jury for? Isn’t that a massive conflict of interest? Lemme check with my lawyer, who was also once my OB-GYN. ANTICIPATION: DRAMA!
HOARDERS – 10:00PM (A&E) A man threatens his wife with divorce if she doesn’t clean. Oh, I see. Another sexist PIG who thinks his wife should also be his maid! How dare you,sir? It’s 2010, and if your wife wants to live underneath a pile of newspapers and dead cats, that is her right. Marriage is not slavery! ANTICIPATION: YUCKY!
CHUCK – 8:00PM (NBC) Tonight’s geektastic guest star is… (spins wheel)… Summer Glau! Congrats, Summer. You win a lifetime supply of emailed marriage proposals. ANTICIPATION: MEOW GLAU!