When the Bears signed Martellus Bennett last week, they picked up a tight end who can block and catch. They also picked up a man who works Twitter like no other. His hilarious tweets need to be a part of your Twitter life.
He calls himself the Black Unicorn, and talks about how he should have a whale farm.
I deserve to have a whale farm. And those whales should give birth to miniature dolphins that beautiful kids can take home. — Martellus Bennett (@JoeGryffindor) March 19, 2013
But not everything is silly. He talks about how important art is for children and for schools, and then adds nuggets like this.
Without imagination we have no future. — Martellus Bennett (@JoeGryffindor) March 20, 2013
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We also get a look at his relationship with his wife, and their move to Chicago. OK, perhaps we get too close of a look. When his wife tweeted that she was enjoying a glass of wine while packing up their home in New Jersey, check out his response.
"@siggibennett: This wine is helping though." Less wine more packing my love. — Martellus Bennett (@JoeGryffindor) March 20, 2013
Easy there, Martellus! She is packing while he is in south Florida training with Brandon Marshall.
He also does question and answers with fans, with predictably weird answers.
"@pokapops if you could have dinner with any 3 people living or dead, who would they be?" Scooby Doo, Abe Lincoln and Kool aid. — Martellus Bennett (@JoeGryffindor) March 20, 2013
"@bradleybananas: @joegryffindor Dragons or Chupacabras?" Mmmm. Monkey Chupacabras are the illest. New species. — Martellus Bennett (@JoeGryffindor) March 19, 2013
He'll add plenty to the Bears' offense. He caught five touchdown passes last season, and has much more potential than Kellen Davis. But he'll add some fun to the team, which will make them even more fun to cheer for.