We have an important mission to give you, Grizzly Detailers. Matt Forte is up for consideration to be the cover boy for the next edition of the popular Madden video game. Forte beat out Jay Cutler to be the Bears representative, and now our beloved running back is part of a tournament to decide who will end up on the cover.
Bears fans, we cannot allow this. We cannot allow the Madden Curse to befall the centerpiece of the Chicago offense. In recent years, the curse made Peyton Hills miss five games and experience a falloff in production, and forced Drew Brees to throw more interceptions than he ever had before.
The Madden Curse is real, and it needs to stay away from Chicago. We already have more than enough sports-related curses.
Let's nip it in the bud by knocking Forte out of competition early. Vote for San Francisco's Patrick Willis, Forte's competition in the first round. Ensure Forte doesn't take another step towards the Madden cover and the curse that follows.
In fact, let's throw all of our support behind a neighbor. Green Bay Packer Aaron Rodgers is also in the tournament. Why not throw your support behind him? If Chicago is going to support anyone for the cover of Madden, it should be a fellow NFC Norther.
After all, this is Chicago. If there is one thing we know how to do, it's stuff a ballot box.