Ben’s Breakfast Blog

Oh, What a Lovely Tea Party

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    NEWSLETTERS

    * Have you seen the new images from Tim Burton's "Alice in Wonderland"?  (That's Johnny Depp, BTW) It should be called Tim Burton's "Nightmare Factory."  Eeesh.

    * You know, I've spent the last 15 years of my life wondering how I can turn scars into jewelry.  And today, my ship has come in.

    Why do women date jerks?  Because the rest of us need plenty of things to complain about.

    * Blow your mind with these Soviet-era Russian album covers.  ("In Mother Russia, album covers YOU.)

    * Nobody wants to look at dirty underwear, especially when it's hanging inches away from your hotel balcony.

    Scientists find the most lifeless place under the sea.  Its land-based equivalent would be my bedroom.

    * Jon & Kate are separating.  They cited irreconcilable hairdos.

    * Here's your list of pros and cons to becoming a Hooter girl.  Pro: Men love you.  Con: ... with their grabby, grabby hands.

    * I must be more exhausted than I give myself credit for.  I've fallen asleep six times (no exaggeration) over the course of writing just this.  Patience, readers.  I'll get 'er up to speed...